New babies are everywhere in my village as of late.  That means shopping for showers, sprinkles, and Christmas all in one.  Personally, I think babies get way too many gifts for people who can't feed themselves or walk.  I like to make my shower/new baby gifts to be geared more towards the needs of the mama. If anyone deserves a present, it is the sleep deprived woman who has just given, or is about to give, birth.  Here are some of my go to gifts for moms of new babies.

The Demdaco Giving Shawl
I don't know about you but, my postpartum nights were spent swinging from sweating through my pjs with hot flashes to shivering because I cooled off halfway through the feeding session.  This soft and sumptuous shawl is perfect for those late night/early morning feedings.  It is perfect for throwing on when you need the extra warmth and it is easier to take off while rocking a baby than a cardigan or robe.  It comes in a beautiful gift box and includes a bookmark with the sweetest note printed on it, "We all need a little comfort now and then…A reminder to help us know that we are not alone in the world…That there is someone in our corner, ready with a hug, no matter what. Always know you are being thought of, cheered on, and loved for exactly who you are - Someone who is beautiful and wonderfully made."
Of course, the very best part is that IT HAS A POCKET!  That was a godsend during long nursing sessions or when my boys fell asleep on me because it allowed me to have my Kindle and phone handy. 

Postpartum  Affirmations and Journal for New Moms
It says "for new moms" but, I  would have loved to have had these positive little gems after the births of either of my boys.  That 4th trimester was rough for me with all sorts of hormone fueled intrusive thoughts and postpartum anxiety.  These cards would have been an amazing tool for my mental health and to encourage self care.  There are 40 affirmation cards featuring lovely illustrations of mothers and babies that are diverse in several ways including depictions of mothers of various skin colors, mothers with physical disabilities, and mothers wearing  head coverings , and even some proudly displaying rolls that pregnancy and life gives many of us. These are not faith based affirmations so you can be secure in giving this gift to friends and family that are any religion or not religious at all. The included journal makes a great tool for moms of newborns to do short daily mental health check-ins, brain dumps or worries, notes from postpartum doctor visits, etc.  More than anything, a gift like this lets the mom of a newborn in your life know that you value her mental well being and support her self care needs.

Pressing Pause 
Pressing Pause: 100 Quiet Moments for Moms to Meet Jesus is a great book for Christian moms at any stage of motherhood.  The relatable stories and soul warming biblical insights and prayers are long enough to be meaningful and short enough to fit into a busy mom's schedule.  I have come back to this book during several points in the last 6 years I have spent as a mother and it always brings me peace. 

Free, or close to it,  Meaningful Gifts
If none of the above gifts strike your fancy or fit your budget, there are lots of wonderful things you can give that will still support the women that bring the babies we love into this world.  

• ​​Judgement free cleaning sessions - offer to come tidy up the house or do the mountains of laundry that babies create so that mom can spend time focused on bonding with babies.
• Freezer meals - this Christmas I am giving my mom friends the gift of a night without deciding what is for dinner.  I am making a couple different soups in large batches and freezing a family size portion for their families and mine.  With a sharpie on my vacuum sealed bag, I will write any directions needed to reheat and serve a delicious home cooked by someone else meal right on there.  I will also include a bag of tortilla strips, for my taco soup, and a bag of eggs noodles, for my chicken noodle soup.  Next time they are too busy to meal plan or too tired to cook, they only need to drop it in a pan or crockpot to reheat.
• A Card Letting Them Know that You are a Safe Person to Text When They Are Overwhelmed - Whether this is their first or 4th child, there comes a point in everyone's postpartum journey that the cluster feeding, sleep deprivation, and the myriad of other adjustments at new baby brings gets to be too much.  A short message that tells them that you recognize that motherhood isn't all sunshine and roses and lets them know you are only a text or phone call away, if they need a listening ear to vent to  in a "congrats on the new baby" card, is a great way to support the new mom in your life and let them know that you aren't going to judge them when mom life seems daunting. 

Hopefully, this list gives you some ideas on how to support the moms with new babies in your life.  Drop a comment below if you have a go to new mom focused present you swear by. 

,Messy play is showing up more and more on Pinterest boards and in mom groups all over Facebook. It is not a new idea, but many people are just discovering both the amazing benefits and the downside of this sort of activity with their young children. Messy play is typically child lead, open ended, and hands on activities that engage multiple senses to stimulate curiosity and enhance learning. Most likely, messy play involves some sort of STEAM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Art, and Math) component to it, as well.  I am including some links to products that I have found helpful with Sensory/messy play at the bottom of this article.  I am an  Amazon Affiliate, which means that I may receive a small commission, if you click and/or order through my links. 

Messy play has many benefits, including but not limited to:

• Engaging more than one of the five senses in learning stimulates cognitive development.
• Encouraging independent learning and creative problem solving
• Building fine motor skills
• Promoting creativity and curiosity with hands on exploration
• Creating a love of learning by putting the fun back into it

The downside is that messy play is, well, messy, and some folks are intimidated by and/or completely opposed to the idea of willingly allowing unpredictable creatures like preschoolers and toddlers to make a mess inside their home.

I am a messy mom. My housekeeping vibe says, “there appears to have been a struggle” CSI style. That being said, I have friends who are very orderly and have houses where people could just drop in anytime. I am pretty sure it is witchcraft and I am super jealous.

No judgement, whatsoever, everyone has their own strengths and housekeeping isn’t one of mine. Being a creative mama and teacher is one of my strengths though so I lean hard into it. My tidy mom friends are always impressed by the projects and fun stuff I do with my boys but often say, “that looks like so much fun but that mess would make me so anxious.” Knowing how important messy play is for kids and how much fun bonding time it can create, I wanted to make it more accessible and less intimidating.

I present to you my messy play tips for those of you that HATE mess and for those of you, like me, who don’t mind the mess but really don’t need another big cleaning project added to the to do list.

1. Plan ahead. Sometimes the best learning experiences are spontaneous but, if you are new to messy play, you want to set yourself and your children for success. Search Pinterest for ideas, decide on an activity, and gather the supplies you will need ahead of time. You don’t want to wing it your first time out of the gate.  Start with something small and easier to clean up and work your way towards more complex and messier setups.

2. Be Selective of Location and Timing. If you have people coming over soon or you have to go somewhere where you want your children to look presentable, skip the messy play that day. You don’t need to add to your stress by having a kid with a blue mustache at your family photoshoot because that washable paint wasn’t as washable as advertised. You also don’t want to do a messy project where you are worried about the furnishings. The best time and place is when you have enough time for the kids to explore without rushing to clean up and in a room like the kitchen, bathroom, sunroom, or any place with a floor that is easy to clean.

3. Cover Up. You don’t have to spend a ton of money to protect clothing and furnishings. You can buy toddler art smocks on Amazon or you can throw a clean garbage bag with a head hole and arm holes cut out over your child and yourself. I have used both and both work great. I also have just had the boys take off their shirts to do projects before and we have some dedicated work/play pants they wear that are already stained so it doesn’t matter if they get another layer of paint on them.


If you don’t want your hands stained, use gloves, the kids should have bare hands though so that they can get the sensory input of touching what they are playing in. That is unless they have sensory issues or you are using  something that might irritate the skin.

I use trash bags to cover my kitchen stool cushions too. I cover the table in a cheap plastic table cloth from the dollar store or a vinyl one with the fabric backing Walmart. I get the vinyl table cloths at Walmart to cover the floor because they are not as easily torn as the plastic ones from the Dollar Store and I like to reuse them for other messy play projects. I have also used thick wrapping paper to cover the work surface in a pinch. Be sure to cover the floor from under the work surface all the way to a foot or so behind your children because the “splash zone” is often larger than you would think with kiddos. After the activity is done you can pull the corners together and dump any solids, like rice or sand, in the trash and then have the kids wipe it down with a damp paper towels for any food coloring, paint, or other liquids you might have used.

4. Facilitate, don’t dictate. The whole concept of messy play is that the kids figure out how they want to proceed with their exploration. It is not meant for a parent or teacher to tell them what to do for every step. As hard as it is, we have to give them some space to develop their own critical thinking skills and creativity. Supervise quietly as they figure out what they want to do. Only interject if they are doing something crazy like trying to paint the dog or eat the pint, both have happened at my house. If need be, ask questions that lead them to a solution, instead of telling them what the solution is. Give the child loose parts and/or different supplies to explore for a few minutes on their own and then ask them, “what do you think would happen if…”. For example, “ those are some awesome colors of paint on your board, what do you think would happen to them if you stood the board up?” They may decide to check it out themselves or they may happily continue how they were, either way is fine.

5. Do the messiest explorations outside, if you can, or even in the bathtub for easy clean up.

6. Do a mom trade. If you still can’t fathom doing these kind of activities, it’s okay! Don’t beat yourself up, we all have different strengths and hang-ups.  If you are the super tidy mom for whom the idea of oobleck or slime coming within 50 feet of you, find a messy mom that enjoys the mess and make her an offer she can't refuse.  Offer to do a task that she hates, like the dishes or organizing a closet, while she leads your kids and her kids in a messy play activity at her house.  I would absolutely LOVE if my friends offered to fold some laundry and put it away while I went and made a mess with the kids!  

Not really wanting to do a chore at someone else's house? Do a kid swap with a friend who loves sensory and messy play and be honest about why.  For example, "I loved your post about the cool experiments that you and the kids are doing.   I have a hard time doing those sorts of things because purposely making a mess makes me anxious.  Would you be willing to do a swap?  You have my kids over to have some messy science fun for a couple hours sometime this week and next week I will take your off your hands for a couple hours to have some fun at my house."  Again, I would jump at that offer.  I love when my friends and I are able to give each other some kid free time and, for some reason, our kids behave so much better together than they do apart. 

In the end, just remember that you are creating memories, not just messes.  You don't have to fundamentally change who you are as a person who loves order. Start small and simple and see how much your kiddos like it.  That might just give you the motivation to go further out of your comfort zone the next time.  Reflect upon the fact that we are constantly pushing our children out of their comfort zones to try new foods, sports, activities, etc., and what a good example you will be setting for them, if you stretch yourself now and then too. 
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I had a lot to get done today but after my boys' fifth tandem meltdown, I gave up on my to do list and took everyone outside.  It was one of those frustrating mom moments and in the back of my mind was that old cliché advice, "the laundry will always be there, they are only little once,"  and so I then felt guilty on top of being irritated.  That started me thinking on all the cliché advice new parents, mothers especially, get and how toxic it can be.  It sets parents up for failure and amps up the anxiety of already anxious people, like me. So I put together a list of, probably well meaning but essentially toxic, advice that I wish I had never heard and hope to never hear again. 

"The laundry will always be there but kids don't stay little for long"
The point of this advice is for parents to realize that the time for having a spotless house is not when their kids are little, but they should, instead, focus on their children and developing memories and solid relationships with them while they are still young and primarily at home.  It is good in theory BUT, guess what?  In reality, THE LAUNDRY WILL ALWAYS BE THERE!!! As in, you can't wait until your kids grow up to address the growing piles of it.   Should a spotless house be our only concern? No. Do we still need to clean our house regardless of how old our kids are? Yes

I am not the best housekeeper and I have no problem leaving the dishes in the sink so that we can have extra cuddle time or a family walk.  That being said, there are days when I need to get things done so I don't end up losing a kid under a pile of mega blocks and my husband doesn't have to wear one of my blouses to work because I haven't done laundry. When those days come, I need not to have the mom guilt and anxiety amplified by hearing that whatever task I need to accomplish is menial compared to spending time with my children.  In the grand scheme of things, dishes are low on the priority list but, if someone doesn't do them, I can't cook meals for these precious children.

"Sleep when the baby sleeps"
This is tried and true advice that every new mother gets and I loathe it.  First of all, new babies sleep on a crazy schedule because they have nothing else on the agenda but being cute, eating, crying, sleeping, and pooping.  That is it.  Moms, on the other hand, need to do lots of other things to keep their families and themselves alive. If we slept while the baby slept, we'd never get to shower, eat, cook, clean, talk to another adult, nor have any kind of sex life with our partner, etc. 

Should new moms take a nap when they need it, if the baby is sleeping? Absolutely!  Should they also feel free to catch up on other things during that time so that when the baby wakes up they can be present and involved with the sweet little bundle of wonder? Also, yes. 

"Don't blink, it goes by so fast" and "Enjoy every moment" 
These little nuggets are usually said by parents who have raised their children, if not fully, at least into a much more independent state.  They look back on the times they had with their kids as babies and toddlers through a rosy glow of amnesia that blocks out the temper tantrums and times they spent crying in the shower.  They see their children grown and long for one last sticky cuddle or annoying mid week tball game.  I think that is normal and something we all can relate to when we look back at times in our life, like high school, that seem so much more carefree now that time has distanced us from the day to day turmoil that time period brings. 

The thing is, when you have recently spent the afternoon cleaning poop mixed with vapor rub off the wall of your son's walls, like I have, having someone tell you to enjoy every moment makes you want to hand them the rubber gloves and Clorox wipes and give them a reality check of what parenting young children is actually like.  It puts unnecessary pressure on parents because there are many moments of parenting that are not enjoyable and they should be able to feel that and voice that without being made to feel like they aren't grateful for their kids and the lives they are living. 

I suffered two miscarriages and two high risk pregnancies, My boys are the miracles that I prayed for and I am so beyond grateful to be their mom.  None of that changes because I don't enjoy talking my child down like a hostage negotiator when he has his daily epic meltdown.  My love for my children is not measured by how much I enjoy sleep deprivation due to my youngest's sleep regressions. It is measured by the fact that I hate sleep regressions but still get up, stumble to his room, and soothe my little guy anyway.

Constantly reminding parents of the need to enjoy every second with their children because time goes by so fast is anxiety producing.  We are all aware that time flies but hearing that all the time makes anxious mamas, like me. worry that any time spent without our children is a waste of this precious quickly dwindling time.  We fret over that romantic getaway, that is desperately needed, or put off self care and hobbies outside our families because the kids are only little once and we need to soak it all up.  Of course, then once the kids are grown, we find that our marriages are distant and we have no life outside our kids to fall back on. 

Try this instead
So if you are like me, and are tired of hearing these old standbys, what can we say and do to change the mentality to one that supports new parents rather than dismissing what they are going through or adding more pressure to their overburdened shoulders.

• "I don't miss those days." I would much rather hear that while my kid is throwing a fit in the park than enjoy every minute.  It is honest and lets us know that it is okay not to enjoy every part of parenting.  I had someone say that to me the other day as I was trying and failing to wrangle both my boys in a shopping cart.  It was gratifying because I knew this lovely woman in her 60s probably adored her kids and missed the baby snuggles at times but was content with where she was in life. It gave me hope that one day I will have grown children and not spend every moment wishing they were little again.
• "Can I come over and clean while you and the baby nap or watch the baby while you take a shower or do something for yourself?"  This is a gift that costs nothing but means everything.  If acknowledges that it is sometimes impossible to take care of a baby and get enough sleep, while maintaining a household and taking care of yourself.  It says to your friend that you understand that parenting is hard and they don't need to apologize for not loving every minute.  It also makes it clear to the mother that you care not just about them as a carrier of children, but also about them as a human being that has their own needs and wants.
• "That sucks, I am sorry you are dealing with ________" or "I remember those times, being a mom/dad is tough stuff." Just validating your friend's frustration at whatever parenting struggle they are going through can make a huge difference.  It can take away a good portion of the guilt we feel when we are frazzled by our children and acknowledges that parenting is not an easy job.  It also lets them know that they can complain and vent about bad days to you without judgment. This one is especially helpful when accompanied by some coffee or a bottle of wine left on the front porch and a note that says that you are thinking about them.

Now I must go do some laundry while my baby sleeps because it is ALWAYS there.

If you are looking for a story with a beautiful bow on the ending, this isn't it.  If you are looking for a authentic and vulnerable look at how learning that I have ADHD at 41 has impacted my life thus far, this is the post for you.  I can't give you the feel good happy ending because I am not there yet.  I am at the beginning of this journey and I hope, through sharing my story, I can help others going through this not feel so alone.

The Backstory
When I was a kid, in the glorious 80s and 90s, ADHD was something that hyper little boys with behavior problems had.  Little girls RARELY were diagnosed and little girls who were smart, not behavior problems, and did well academically in school definitely didn't get diagnosed.  The mental health and medical fields were a ways off from realizing that ADHD came in different forms and that girls, more often than not, were ADHD inattentive vs ADHD hyperactive.  

I hit middle and high school and those hormones threw me for a loop.  I began to struggle more with organization, forgetting assignments, and things like that but I was in the gifted program and able to be successful, for the most part.  I did get in trouble at school and home for my disorganization and flakiness.  I had "so much potential" but I wasn't applying myself fully or I "wasn't taking things seriously." 

I had anxiety attacks that started around 5th grade but didn't get to be a real problem until I hit my early 20s and had what amounts to a nervous break down.  I could barely leave the house. For 5 years I worked so hard in therapy, through prayer, and to find the right medications.  I finally was able to leave anxiety medicine behind me.  I went back to school at 27 to become a teacher and was president of the education department's student council, in an international honor society for educators, awarded a scholarship for urban educators, piloted a study abroad program for student teaching in China, and received a Top 100 Outstanding Student award my senior year at my university for my community service and academic achievements.  

I went on to become an excellent educator that received accolades in my district, presented at education conferences, was selected for the prestigious Library of Congress Summer Teaching Institute, and received a full ride scholarship from East Carolina University and the Laura Bush Foundation to pursue my MLS.  

On paper I looked like a rock star teacher and all around boss that had my life together but, in reality, I was struggling. My anxiety and depression had come back with a vengeance.  I worked hard and was a creative and empathetic teacher but struggled with the administrative side of my job, consistency, relationships, remembering things, focusing, motivation, and self esteem.  Why was I like this?  Why was I so smart and capable but unable to keep my apartment clean or get to my job 10 mins away without being late?  Why weren't my papers graded and my students' data binders up to date, like my colleagues? Why couldn't I just get stuff done like a normal person? Why did I just zone out or fall asleep when I had so much to do? My answer inevitably would be that I was lazy, weak, flaky, or another of the hundreds of negative things I had heard or thought about myself over the years.  Basically, my conclusion, in spite of my success, is that I was a worthless garbage person and everyone would eventually stop being fooled and figure it out.  Sounds fun, right?

Maybe She's Worthless, Maybe It's ADHD

As a teacher, I began to get lots of forms to fill out from my students' doctors to evaluate them for ADHD.  As I went through multiple pages of questions, I started to see that not only did some of my students need some extra support, but that I ticked off far more of the boxes than one who never even considered themselves to have ADHD should.  I did what all good teachers and librarians excel at, I researched the ins and outs of the disorder.  I found great strategies for my students and began to get the sneaking suspicion that I might be dealing with something more than being a flake.  At that point though, I was starting down the path to becoming "advance maternal age" and trying to get pregnant, or in my case stay pregnant long enough to deliver healthy babies, and getting myself diagnosed or starting new medicine wasn't a priority or a very good idea for the health of the baby.

Time for Me
Fast forward through two miscarriages, two healthy pregnancies, and a pandemic and here I am.  A 41 year old stay at home mom who finally has time to prioritize my own health outside that of being a healthy vessel to carry children.  The first thing I did was go to my doctor and talk about a hysterectomy and my suspicions that I may have ADHD. The doctor asked me why I felt I had it and I started spewing all the issues and examples I had been reflecting on since I started to become aware that ADHD might be something I needed to look into more.

• Time Blindness
• Procrastination
• Short term memory problems
• Starting 20 tasks and finishing none
• Losing things every 3 minutes
• Sensory sensitivities
• Brain Fog
• Leaving my coffee pot outside overnight in the backyard after refilling my cup out there. 
• Putting away leftovers only to realize the next day that I put them in the container cabinet and not the fridge.
• Looking for my phone while on it, at least once a week.
• Extreme Fatigue

And so on and so forth, until she said, "okaaayyy, I think you might be right."  She set me up with a sleep study, a bunch of blood work, and a neuropsychological evaluation.  The sleep study and bloodwork were due diligence to check for things like sleep apnea and hormonal imbalances and thyroid disorders that sometimes can cause symptoms like these. The neuropsych appointment was because she believed that, if this had been going on my whole life, it probably was ADHD.

Neurodivergent...Now What?
Smash cut to a month later and the neuropsychologist confirms ADHD Inattentive as my main issue and my anxiety and depression as secondary issues that stem from trying to cope with ADHD for years undiagnosed.  Neurodivergent, is a term she used and it hit me like a ton of bricks.  All those years I felt out of place and like I didn't think like other people, I was right!  I literally don't process things the same way as other people. Instead of feeling vindicated though, I felt sad and angry.  Sad for that little girl who got in trouble for not being organized and angry because it was presented as a moral failing, when really I lacked executive functioning skills.  Sad because I spent so long feeling like a dumpster fire of a human being and mad because, even now, knowing that my brain is different, that feeling didn't go away.  

Amazing Meds, Therapy, and Grace

So now at, soon to be, 42, I am on medication for my ADHD.  We are still trying to find the exact medication and dosage that serves my needs best but the first few days I was on meds, it was like a whole new world.  Being a former teacher, I can only explain it as when I am unmedicated my brain sounds like when my classes would work on group projects in the room. It was like all my thoughts were shouting to be heard over the group next to them.  There were a lot of great thoughts in there but as a whole, absolute chaos. On medication, it is like when I would lead a class discussion and my students would raise their hands and not talk over each other.  I am able to focus on one or two thoughts at a time instead of having 20 pinballing around in my head. I am so much more productive and less overwhelmed. 

I also am working through the self loathing I have felt for years in therapy and by researching more about this big, busy, beautiful mind of mine. I am learning to give myself grace when the house doesn't look like how I was raised a house should look. I am learning to focus on the attributes and talents I have, instead of dwelling on the ones that are out of my control.  I am also learning how to change some of the things that are in my control by using additional supports.  

One of the things that I do at the end of each day that has really helped is, instead of making a to do list or focusing on all the tasks I didn't complete and beating myself up over it, I make a list of all the things I have accomplished.  Could be big things like swept and mopped the downstairs or little every day things like, fed the kids and got them to preschool on time.  I don't assign a value to the tasks, I just list them and then I sit and look at the proof or read them to my husband.  It makes me feel so much better to end the day looking at a list of what I did versus a task list for the next day, which can leave me overwhelmed and defeated before I start. 

I have been reading books and articles to help me gain insight and strategies on how to overcome ADHD obstacles and develop the "super powers" that those with ADHD can have, "hello, hyper focus!"  I highly recommend The Queen of Distraction by Terry Matlen, if you are a reader.  Another thing that has helped is that I listen to the podcast Motherhood in ADHD by Patricia Sung because it provides me with great information about the patterns, thought processes, and struggles adult women with ADHD face while encouraging me to focus on the amazing things about me as a mother that come straight from that ADHD part of me, like my creative side and my spontaneous nature that makes being my kid fun and educational.  I am also taking one of her online courses that helps ADHD moms create a calendar system that works for OUR specific brains.  You can check out her resources on her website https://www.patriciasung.com. 

Finally, I watch videos from people like the Holderness family (https://theholdernessfamily.com) , Laura Clery (https://lauraclery.com), and Dr, Kojo Sarfo when I am feeling down about ADHD problems.  Penn and Kim are very outspoken about Penn's ADHD and how it is a blessing and sometimes a curse.  Laura Clery and her husband, Stephen, recently were diagnosed with ADHD and documented the whole process.  Dr. Kojo Sarfo (https://www.kojosarfo.com), is a mental health provider and advocate who has ADHD and makes TikTok type videos about symptoms and situations that will make anyone with ADHD say, "oh my goodness, SAME!"  All of these folks tackle ADHD and mental health with humor and authenticity that just makes me feel better about myself along the way.  

Like I said, there is no neat bow on this story.  It honestly is a journey I have only recently realized I was on.  I share it, in its raw and unfinished state, because I know I can't be the only one that needs to hear that it is okay to struggle with it but learning to love yourself is important, no matter what age you start. 

Playdoh Play Date

*Disclaimer: I am an Amazon affiliate and may receive a small commission when you click on/purchase something via the links in my articles. I will never recommend a product that I haven't used and loved, though."

Today was play date day for my boys and my friend's 2 year old boy.  I knew we would have a 1 year old, 2 year old, and 4 year old navigating playing together so I made some playdoh up ahead of time.  My thoughts were that it would be a great ice breaker because it lends itself to parallel play. I put some items in my little tray I use for playdoh and the boys had a blast get.  My friend was surprised at the soft texture and lack of that weird smell that comes with the store bought kind she had used in the past.  When I told her that it was homemade, she was way more impressed than necessary because, to be honest, playdoh is the EASIEST thing in the world to make! 

Now before people comment that Playdoh is messy and a nightmare to clean up, let me just say two things.  First, as a former teacher, I want to point out that learning is often messy, embracing that kind of mess will benefit your children in so many ways.  Second, this playdoh is really a cinch to clean up.  Even on carpet, if you let it dry out, you can crunch it up into dust and vacuum it out. 

Some Benefits of Playdoh

My playdoh recipe is noncook and takes maybe all of 5 minutes, start to finish.  It is a great recipe for little ones to help with too, provided that you are the one that pours the cup of boiling water in.  My mom was a preschool teacher for 28 years and so as a kid we always had some of this around as a boredom buster.   Little did we know the benefits went far beyond entertainment.

Some of those benefits include:

• It strengthens tiny, and not so tiny, hands.  This helps down the road with scissor skills and writing.  Hand strength is a big component when it comes to holding a pencil, drawing, and cutting.
• It hones fine motor skills.  Fine motor skills are used to pinch and squish the dough, roll balls, make snakes, and sculpt their favorite shapes. 
• It is calming.  Kneading the playdoh provides sensory input, applies gentle pressure and stimulation to the joints of the hands and fingers, and creates a sort of rhythmic calm, much like squeezing a stress ball. 
• It promotes problem solving skills, creativity, and imaginative play.  Take this picture to the left here. My 4 year old and I set out to make a dino world. We had to think of the colors that would be needed.  then we had to figure out how to make the world itself.  We rolled out the grass and he decided wanted to cut it and put a river in. He wanted a volcano, so we tried sculpting one and when that wasn't satisfactory, we ended up wrapping it around a small cup to get the shape we wanted.  Problem solving and creative ideas were needed in every step of creating this scene.  Then we added the dinosaurs and imaginative play became the focus.  
• It can be used in tactile learning.  When I was teaching 3rd grade one of my options for word work was to make their spelling words out of playdoh.  the kids loved it and pairing the hands on creation of the words with the repetition of spelling them out, helped them retain the words more easily. 

There are lots more but these are the ones that really speak to me the most and the main reasons I make playdoh regularly for my boys.  That and it is just fun!

The Recipe 

Ingredients

• 1.5 cups Flour
• 1/2 cup Salt
• 2 tsp Cream of Tarter ***If you plan on making this often, I recommend getting a large bag from Amazon.  Click here for what I use
• 2.5 - 3 TBL of Coconut Oil* (Liquefied) *You can also use vegetable oil but I think the coconut oil is a little softer.  Start off with 2.5 tablespoons but then add more if you find it too dry or tough to knead. 
• 1 cup boiling water
• Food Coloring (Optional)  I prefer gel food coloring for more vibrant colors but any food coloring will work. 

Directions

1. Throw the dry ingredients in a mixing bowl and give it a stir.
2. Pour in the oil and the boiling water.  I usually just throw a microwave safe glass measuring cup in the microwave right before I start measuring out all the ingredients and it is boiling by the time I am done.  You could also use the stove. 
3. Stir it all together until dough forms. 
4. Let it cool a couple minutes and then begin kneading the dough by hand to make sure everything is mixed through. 
5. If the dough is too sticky, add more flour.  If the dough is hard to knead add a bit more oil to smooth out the texture. 
6. Once it is the right texture, I break it a part into several balls depending on the numbers of colors I want to make.
7. Make an indentation in the dough ball and add a few drops of food coloring. Fold the dough over the coloring and continue to knead in your hand until the color is worked through. NOTE: if you don't want to get coloring on your hands, wear gloves.  I don't personally care if I end up with some extra color on my hands but I also don't have anywhere to be where that would be seen.  You can also add the color to the water before you pour it in, if you want to avoid getting drops of straight food coloring on your hands and are only making on color. 

That's it!  It is so easy! I hope you try it and love it!  

We finally got some cold weather here in the south and I decided to whip up some cozy goodness with an educational twist.  My 4 year old is learning his ABCs at preschool and I thought alphabet soup would be the perfect way to have some delicious fun with letters. 


​I ordered the pasta on Amazon and it came in a box with several packages.  This is great because I can use some for cooking and some for sensory bins.  The awesome thing about this soup is that you can use any kind of veggies you have on hand.  I used a mixture of fresh, canned, and frozen veggies for this recipe.  It is also a very easy recipe for kids to help with because it is mainly just dumping ingredients in the pot.  The recipe is below, along with a link for the pasta I used. Check out the video to see my 4 year old assistant chef in action. 

Ingredients
1Tbl Olive Oil
1 Chopped Onion
2 Celery Stalks
2 Tbls Minced Garlic
1 can of Diced Tomatoes
1 Tbls of Italian Seasoning
2 -3 Tbls Tomato Paste (depending on how much tomato taste you like)
Alphabet Pasta (See Link Below Recipe)
2 Boxes of Broth (I used beef but you can use veggie or chicken, if you prefer)
Salt and Pepper to Taste
Veggies of Your Choice
I used:
1 Cup Broccoli
1 can corn
1 can green beans
1 bag of frozen peas and carrots
 
 Directions

1. Add a drizzle of oil to pot and sauté the onions, garlic, and celery until tender.
2. Add in veggies, diced tomatoes, tomato paste, Italian seasoning, and salt and pepper to taste.
3. Add enough broth to cover your veggies.
4. Bring to a boil.
5. Reduce heat and let simmer for 15 mins
6. Add pasta and cook until tender (approx. 7-10 mins depending on the pasta)

No one told me that the traditional sixth anniversary gift was changed from iron to COVID, but here we are.  COVID has ran it's nasty little germs through our preschool, neighborhood tribe, and my hub's office and finally, we have been hit.  It started with a call from the preschool twenty minutes after I dropped my 4 year old off, "We are so sorry, we have had two parents call today and two kids in his class have tested positive so we are shutting down the class for the week."  No big deal, he wasn't there the week before to be exposed to those kids. 

We went to the library and grabbed a Happy Meal and went home to play.  About 2pm he sat on my lap and I could tell he had a fever.  102 and rising. Crap! This was it! Three years of avoiding catching this junk and it finally caught us.  He tested positive and the next day my 1 year old started showing symptoms.  Now, I am not sure you are aware, but preschoolers and toddlers aren't known for their respect of personal body space.  My husband and I are both vaccinated but about the time my feverish 1 year old LICKED MY ACTUAL EYEBALL, I realized that there was no way the adults in this situation were making it out unscathed. Sure enough, the body aches, congestion, and sore throat came for both of us within the next two days.

Which brings us to the two of us sitting on the couch on our anniversary, coughing and watching a movie after finally wrestling our two adorable little petri dishes into bed.  Was it the way I pictured it? No, but it is an appropriate end to what has been an "interesting" year of marriage.  This year we lost a beloved Jeep to a wreck, our two even more beloved senior German Shepherds six months a part, and a not so beloved uterus.  Okay, losing the uterus will be great in the long run but it also brought 8 weeks of recovery and physical restrictions that impacted everyone in the house. 

It has been a rough year but there was also so much joy to reflect on as well.  This year we have seen our baby boy take his first steps, heard his first words, and watched in awe as he made his first successful high level escape attempt. We have seen our big boy thrive in his first year of preschool, become the most articulate 4 year old I know, and laughed at too many Willy-isms to count. Our date nights are few and far between right now but our days are filled with so much life and love. It seems fitting that our sixth year of marriage ends with the entire family sick and canceled plans because what I love best about us is not the days when everything goes right, it is how we pull closer together when everything goes wrong, finding humor, love, and grace when there is seemingly none to be found.

I am not going to say I didn't go to bed a little sad and disappointed that we were too sick to enjoy our anniversary the way we planned.  I did, because I am human and miss time alone with my favorite person. It's just that I have come to learn over the last six years of marriage that the best parts about being married are often times also the worst parts.  It is the hand holding yours as the doctor tells you there is no heartbeat.  It is the encompassing hug and your favorite meal at the end of a terrible day. It is having someone to talk you down as you give a seriously pissed off and feverish toddler a cool bath at 3 am and wonder if you need to take him to the ER.  It is making eye contact with your partner across the room as your preschooler throws his fifth massive fit today over some minor issue, and knowing that, even though everything is overwhelming right now, you are not alone.  It is having someone there to bear witness to your story in both the good and bad chapters.  For that, even through the phlegm and fatigue of COVID, I am truly thankful.   

Y'all, I don't know about you but, true to my ADHD nature, I get super stoked when I see these elaborate play set ups on the mom groups that I follow and want to immediately set up the most beautiful scenarios for my kids to enjoy, completely forgetting that my boys are...well, how do I put this?  My boys behave in completely developmentally appropriate ways for their ages. In other words, they are tiny tornados of energy and emotions that can demolish my best laid plans in no time at all. 

Anyway, so I waited until the kids went to bed and spent an hour setting up an elaborate playscape, posted these beautiful pictures, and patted myself on the back as hundreds of comments and reactions came in through my FB notifications. I couldn't wait until the next morning when the boys saw it and explored it all while I drank my coffee and watched them. 

Needless to say, morning came and things did not go as planned. Within four minutes both of my boys were in tears. It seems that with my 1 and 4 year old boys, no matter how spread out the table activity is, someone is going to be a jerk to someone else and/or not play the way the other wants to play.

The one year old, also known as Thanos the Destroyer of Worlds, wanted to immediately rip everything off the table and put it in his mouth. I redirected him to the other area and showed him how to roll cars down the ramp. Then the 4 year old decided he wanted the car that the 1 year old had because I commented on how well it fit the 1 yo’s hand. Obviously, that was his sign that he should ignore the multiple other cars on the setup and take that particular car from his little brother. Next up Thanos decided to play a game of knock off and pick up with the wooden house big brother was using as a animal hospital. Big bro lost his mind over that but I persisted and went to grab some velcro to velcro the house in place so it couldn’t be knocked off.  While I was distracted doing that, Thanos lost interest in annoying his brother and decided he needed to go over and grab my coffee cup, pouring it EVERYWHERE. As I was cleaning that up, he went under the table and popped the cover off since the house was velcroed to it. Soooo, I velcroed the cover down.

In short, it was like that scene in the first Avengers movie where the giant worm thing flies through the portal and starts ramming into buildings in NYC and everything is chaos. My dreams of them nicely playing while instrumental music played and I drank my coffee went out the window. That being said, once the one year old lost interest and went in search of new worlds to conquer, my 4 year old loved the setup and played for a long while making up all sorts of scenarios. Included are some pictures of the devastation. I will be ordering some wooden counselors to come help the other wooden people through the trauma of being flung about and attacked by a mouthy toddler and a grabby preschooler.

 I wanted to share the reality of the day because I think sometimes we, or maybe just I do, look at these beautiful setups and think that “this mom here has her stuff together,” and picture everyone playing serenely with angels singing or some such nonsense.  Maybe that does happen somewhere.  Maybe there are kids that are unicorns and play gently side by side all day.  Given the comments I received when I posted the tragic update to all my mom groups the next day though, I think it is safe to say there are a lot more moms out there with spilled coffee and kids in time out for throwing an ice cream truck driven by a penguin at their brother's head.  If that is you, congratulations, you are not alone.  If that isn't, please share with us where you get the baby chloroform! (Please note, I am kidding and would never sedate or encourage drugging children).

Product Details:
Road Bin Inserts by Practically Playing 
Wooden People, Pets, Houses, Cars are from the Target Bullseye section of the store

As a former school librarian, I know first hand the importance of early literacy and making sure our babies have a variety of texts available to them at a young age. I have 4 yo and 1 yo boys and this week I have been working on organizing their spaces, including their books. I thought some of my friends might appreciate the what and whys of what I did book wise.

1. The 4 yo went through his board books and selected about 25 to give to his brother. He was so proud to help his brother build his library and this helped to reinforce that, when building a library, we have to make space occasionally for new books by finding new homes for ones we have outgrown. Anything beyond repair was trashed or will be used in arts and crafts.

2. I went through his picture books and removed a ton until I had just enough so that he could see the covers of all the books on the shelves. These are our bedtime and rest time reading books. Having the covers facing out allows him to pick. Removing the extra books from those wall shelves makes choosing less overwhelming.

I stored all the books we aren’t using right now in bins in his closet. I will rotate out the ones currently on the wall shelves next month and put some of the ones from the closet in their place. That allows us to not get bored with our selection and gives books that normally might be ignored, because they were behind a favorite, a chance to be in the spotlight.

3. I put a cube shelf in my 1 yo’s room that he could easily reach and put all the board books his brother had given him on there along with a couple toys and soft books. He has loved taking them off and on the shelves and looking through them on his own and with us. It is really important for children to be able to touch and chew on books at this stage, as well as being read to, because this is how they first become interested in interacting with books and leads to the development of concepts of print skills.

Pictured are:
- the wooden wall shelves I had my husband build when I was pregnant with our oldest.
- my oldest son’s little reading book shelf all with books that can be handled independently by him and his brother without being destroyed, so board books and the like. It gets a ton of use and is always filled with books going every which way. Also the side cushions are often missing because they make great shields when fighting off super villains.
-my youngest’s little book cubby
-my oldest reading to my youngest one of the books he gave him. Note, my oldest doesn’t actually read yet but he is retelling the story to his brother which is an awesome prereading skill.

Vapor billows gently from the humidifier, placed strategically out of reach of the one year old terrorizing the living room, and the smell of Vicks wafts from my four year old's chest.  Ah...It is beginning to look and smell a lot like cold and flu season around our house.  There is no doubt that the blissful time of year where someone's nose is always needing wiped is upon me.  Both the boys are sick with coughs and noses that are somehow  stuffy and runny at the same time. 

If 10 years of teaching elementary and middle school has taught me anything, it is that germs are the one thing that children share freely.  For the most part, it isn't a big deal.  Getting an occasional virus helps build their little immune systems.  We have vaccines to ward off or minimize most of the big scary viruses.  Thank you, science! However, as any parent that has dealt with a whiny snotty child sneezing directly into their ocular cavity will tell you, their germ sharing often goes beyond their little school friends.  

So what can we do to minimize the passing of germs to one another?  Well, the CDC and our mothers have been telling us for years that the best thing we can do is wash our hands thoroughly and frequently, cover our mouths and noses when we sneeze and cough, and stay away from each other when we know we are sick.  It is pretty basic stuff for adults, even though the pandemic has shown that some adults still don't comprehend it.  Children are new here and need to be taught these things though.  The best way I have found to teach kids these skills is a combo of modeling, reading books, and watching videos. 

Modeling is the easy part, it just involves consistently washing your own hands while reinforcing why it is important. For example, "Hey, buddy, we just came in from playing outside, time to get all those germies off our hands. Grab your stool and we can wash our hands together, but don't you dare steal my soap."  The "don't steal my soap" is a game I play with my 4 year old to get him to wash his hands longer.  I put soap on my hands and he "steals" it by grabbing some for himself.  Then I act all indignant and try to steal it back, all the while rubbing it on his hands.  He thinks it is hilarious and doesn't fight me with the typical, "I can do it myself," battle cry of independence when it is a game. 

As for the books and videos, I have put together a handy dandy list of resources below for you to use with your kids.  If you have any to add, please let me know.  The key to developing any healthy habit is repetition so read and watch your kid's favorites frequently and praise them each time they make the great choices to cover their mouth or remember to wash their hands.  Will any of this completely stop your kids from sharing germs with you and each other? Absolutely, not.  I share this in the hopes that it makes teaching our kids lifelong healthy habits easier and, fingers crossed, reduces the number of times you have to break out the vapor rub this Winter.